My Writing — Jake Uitti

Kids at heart: Seattle musicians are devoted to their young audiences

“It was a long time coming,” says musician Chris Ballew, swirling on a stool in his West Seattle home studio.

Ballew is speaking, of course, about his second act in music: Caspar Babypants.

Co-founder and frontman of the rock band The Presidents of the United States of America, Ballew says the lifestyle of a stadium rock group wore him down. But a new voice — one he’d always been looking for — struck him one day in the car thanks to a tantrum by his 2-year-old son, Augie.

His wife at the time, Mary-lynn (the two are now divorced), soothed their young son, singing the refrain, “Run, baby, run. Run, run, run.” Augie was calmed.

“I saw it work and I was amazed by it,” Ballew says.

EssayJake UittiAugust 7, 2016Seattle Times

How being called ‘fat boy’ growing up still affects my dating life today

It was a cold December afternoon when my grandmother, followed by her hobbling collie Tina, pushed the front door open. She put her bags down and looked at me standing there in the middle of the dining room. “Still fat are you?” she asked in her bitter, 80-year-old French accent. “Hmm.”

EssayJake UittiJune 23, 2016Washington Post

I’m in my 30s. Is it too late to explore my sexuality?

I’ve kissed a few men in my life. There was the time a few years ago, at about 3 a.m., when my close friend and neighbor, drunk as all hell, kissed me on the lips before running inside his apartment. And there was that other time, in high school, playing spin the bottle with three guys and three girls.

EssayJake UittiJune 15, 2016Washington Post

I thought I was going to marry her. After we broke up, here’s how I coped.

Bennifer. Charlize Theron and Sean Penn. Kermit and Miss Piggy. (I’m not quite over that last one.)

Couples break up all the time. And while each split is different, for me, the first three months were the hardest. My girlfriend of three years and I broke up around Christmas, and I’m starting to feel like a normal human being again.

EssayJake UittiApril 11, 2016Washington Post

9 sites that would make our dating lives easier

Googling your date — and finding only their marathon times and real estate records — is so 2009. Here are nine other websites that would be helpful in the dating world.

Want to know if she actually reads in between Facebooking? Check. Want to know who’s a closet racist? Check. Listen up, Silicon Valley angel investors!

EssayJake UittiJanuary 26, 2016Washington Post

'Silicon Valley' Star Talks Green Technology, Saving the Environment

If you’ve ever seen the HBO comedy Silicon Valley–specifically the episode featuring the Tech Crunch Disrupt competition where start-up company Pied Piper wins for its data compression software–you might have an idea of what Microsoft’s Imagine Cup is like. Last Friday, thousands of bright developers and future Microsoft hopefuls came together to examine what’s next on the software horizon.

EssayJake UittiAugust 24, 2015Seattle Mag

Vinyl Revival

Seattle resident Chris Darrell, also known as DJ absoluteMadman at area nightclubs, finds a certain Zen quality to the process of playing a vinyl record. There is taking the album out of the sleeve, cleaning it, placing it on the turntable and gently dropping the needle. He maintains that the mechanics of the operation put him at ease.

EssayJake UittiJuly 1, 2015Alaska Beyond/TMR

Beacon Hill Blues: 3 local artists ponder the "G-word"

We met at the Station, a coffee house on 16th Ave. South in Beacon Hill. The small, unassuming shop feels like the epicenter of a neighborhood at a crossroads. We sat together around a small table by the door: the rapper Gabriel Teodros, 206 Zulu founder King Khazm, rapper and Cleveland High School teacher Chevas Gary and me. Our two-hour-long talk about Beacon Hill’s changing face gave me a glimpse of the neighborhood through the eyes of these artists, who’ve lived here most, if not all, their lives.

EssayJake UittiMay 25, 2015Crosscut

Going Inside the Geekfest that is Emerald City Comicon

If you find yourself approaching the Washington State Convention Center later this month and Thor, Wonder Woman or Geordi La Forge hold the door open for you, just smile, nod a “thank you” and step right in like you belong. You’ve arrived at Emerald City Comicon (ECCC)—ground zero for Seattle’s superhero fandom.

EssayJake UittiMarch 1, 2015Seattle Mag

KEXP groundbreaking the beginning of a radio metamorphosis

Prolific and world-famous, Pearl Jam lead guitarist Mike McCready has flipped his fair amount of amplifier switches: from Fenders to Dr. Z’s. But Wednesday he flipped the switch on an amp that may mean as much to Seattle music fans as any he’s touched. Wednesday, McCready turned on the amp from which the inaugural power chord and guitar lick were played, commemorating the groundbreaking of KEXP 90.3’s new Seattle Center home.

EssayJake UittiJanuary 28, 2015Crosscut

Getting to Know the Seattle Riot

Everyone in Seattle has heard about the Mariners, the Sounders and, of course, the Seahawks. There are people who still wear Seattle SuperSonics t-shirts and jerseys, clinging to the NBA team we lost. But there's another team in town worth paying attention to that is practicing hard, inspiring youth and bringing home trophies and championships.

EssayJake UittiOctober 31, 2014Seattle Mag

The Art of the Public House

A lot is written about craft cocktails and the art of bartending, but much less is written about the art of the public house: those neighborhood tap rooms that are literally open housesand not private clubs. Those places where Cheers might be set, where Dubliners might meet for a Guinness or where people in Seattle’s Ravenna neighborhood might order a beer and a burger from me before heading home.

EssayJake UittiSeptember 26, 2014City Arts

The Monarch Drinks With Damien Jurado

Before sitting with him, I had no idea the influence songwriter Damien Jurado believes God has on his life.

Marco Collins, Damien and I meet in the hallway of The Original Pancake House on the corner of West 15th and 80th on a Saturday morning. After exchanging gossip about which Seattle singer is doing well in Paris, the largest show Damien ever played and who The Posie’s Ken Stringfellow is working with over seas, the three of us take a seat at a table in the middle of the quaint, hard-wood restaurant. Our waitress brings coffee, as other servers distribute plates of waffles, omelets and giant breakfasts. A few minutes later, she takes our order for pancakes, eggs, hash browns and bacon (the best in town, according to the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame DJ, Marco).

EssayJake UittiFebruary 17, 2014The Monarch Review

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